Inside Of Every Demon

I have a dream
I'm here to tell
About a wonderful, fantastic new hotel
Yes, it's one of a kind
Right here in Hell
Catering to a special clientele
(Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!)

Inside of every demon is a rainbow
Inside every sinner is a shiny smile
Inside of every creepy hatchet-wielding maniac
Is a jolly, happy, cupcake-loving child

We can turn them 'round!
They'll be heaven-bound!
With just a little time
Down at the Happy Hotel!

So all you junkies, freaks, and weirdos
Creepers, fuck-ups, crooks, and zeroes
And downfallen superheroes, hope is here!

All of you cretins, sluts, and losers
Sexual deviants, and boozers
And prescription drug abusers
Need not fear

Forever again
We'll cure your sin
We'll make you well
You'll feel so swell
Right here in Hell at the Happy Hotel!

There'll be no more fires
And no more screams
Just puppy dog kisses
And cotton candy dreams
And puffy-wuffy clouds
You're gonna be like "Wow!"
Once you check in with me

So all your cartoon porn addictions
Vegan rants, psychic predictions
Ancient Roman crucifixions
End right here!

All you monsters, thieves, and crazies
Cannibals, and crying babies
Frothing mouth that's full of rabies
Filled with cheer!

You'll be complete!
It'll be so neat!
Our service can't be beat!
You'll be on easy street!
Life will be sweet at the Happy Hotel!